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Sunday, 18 August 2013

me, myself & i. unplugged.

I love social media. I love sharing things with friends on Facebook, I like telling followers on twitter what I'm doing or what I want to do. I like putting several a few photos of my cats on Instagram. When I was away in Italy, I was always hooked onto some social media platform. I always felt like I had to share what I was doing. But why?

Sometimes, some things shouldn't be said on social media. I know it's a tool you can use to express yourself, but why say things that don't need to be said? I've been toying with the idea of starting a personal journal. I can't decide if I want it to be a private blog, or a handwritten one. There's something so gratifying about staring at your own penmanship. Something I need to keep for myself right now.

I need time away from the internet, but I just don't know how. I need to start doing things, and not have to worry about posting a damn photo of it. I feel like I need to get to know myself.

This weekend was mostly about me. A huge chunk of my weekend was dedicated to Netflix. I switched it up from my couch, to my bed, back to the couch and back to my bed. Cuddling with different cats. Curled up under my favourite blanket.

Am I suppose to have a mourning period? I feel like I was so over it months, and months ago...YEARS ago even that I don't need to be upset. I don't know if that makes me a complete jerk. What I feel is guilt. I feel like I'm a time waster. I feel like I was a coward. I feel guilty that I don't have any love left for you and because of that I can't be upset.

I'm not upset. I'm over it. I can now be the best friend, the best daughter, the best granddaughter, the best sister, the best niece, the best me.

No regrets.

2 comments:

Not Specified said...

It really is about being the best you. I learned that a lot lately. Which is something I am working towards. I am hoping you still do this blog I love reading it. I keep a private handwritten blog too on the side. It's really healing to have one. You should really start one. But, it's also nice to be creative and use a blog as an art project. I look at my blogspot more as an art project if anything. If you get what I mean.

heather anne-marie said...

I agree. I have a lot going on in my head and I think having my own personal journal will help with that. I really do enjoy blogging, so I won't give it up :)

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